Episode 3: Culture, mindset, island, and experience
Open the window for clear skies.
Every people knows this city because it is an isolated place for narcotics, terrorism, and serial killer prisoners. Yup! That’s Nusakambangan island located in Cilacap Central Java. As I said it is a horrible and restricted area. We need to be clear about people's mindset about this city about the landmark. Because both Cilacap and Nusakambangan Islands are not scary as we imagined them.
On Adjusting to moving to Cilacap
Chaos is not something to be avoided, but rather something to be conquered. One of the first things I noticed about Cilacap was the ambiance. It was a little quiet at night and little people would hang out. Shops are closed early leaving food stalls alone in the middle of the night. For the moment, spent my time strolling around the city and entering some local markets to check some groceries that I can bring to my stomach. What a surprised welcome expression when I knew the price of local groceries like veggies, herbs, fruits, and food seasoning. This combined when I was in Jakarta. The prices are too high for me who lives in the cheapest area in east java.
For calculation, we occasionally for daily needs to spend around 25k. But here I can spend more than 25k. It’s necessary because I have to learn to adapt to this situation. So it can make me more knowledgeable about my money flow. I was shocked at that time knowing all of the higher lifestyles compared to my hometown. But should have a willingness for adapting outside the comfort zone.
Routine helps during big transitions.
One of the first things to adapt outside our comfort zone is the ability to face a new and different mindset. Different places created different mindsets and people. When hitting the ground on my first step in Cilacap, there were a lot of people’s mindsets that I used to adapt to while in college. This is far away from sentimental opinions or judgment. This is more what i thought during my 3 years period in this peaceful city.
To be honest, I realized what I brought from my place was totally different from when i was here. I think this is what my parents brought to me when i was a kid. It sticks in my mind until i separate for a while from them. For me creating a routine helps me find my balance in life when i didn’t get it from my parents. Mine were journaling and reading. When you’re not sure what tomorrow will hold and the doubt starts creeping in, it’s reassuring to know that at least you can look forward to journaling and reading.
By journaling and reading, i can be more open and critical about the situation surrounding me. It helps me to stay low and calm while the world is full of noise.
To begin to understand a culture, start with the most basic expression.
Everyone has a basic expression for expressing themselves to society. For me to understand something started with trying to listen. Listening can help us get to know about other perspectives and what the culture does in their daily life. Besides trying to understand the society we should understand ourselves too. Basically to survive in long term. I started checking the local goods from the market, checking groceries, and local food to eat. This provided my instinct for what should i need to live. This really opens our minds to thinking clearly to be able more adaptive during exploring and checking the local goods.
Differences are beautiful.
From my point of view by seeing and listening in here, there are many ways in which cilacap little bit different than my home town (of course no doubt). One big difference is their sense of community. For example, I’ve noticed that cilacap people are very much into inside and rarely go outside lately. But when coming social events, most people spent a long time on it. It’s not like other big cities but when quietness comes at night it little bit peaceful because fewer vehicles and people came out at night. Really peaceful!
About self-exploration and the growth it brings
The difficult road leads to the beautiful scenery. Since the beginning, i spent a lot of time trying to craft the perfect sceneries for myself first (which, of course, is hard to do) in cilacap. I’ve written a to-do list for exploring my undiscovered cave. And it is very helpful. Discover what i want in life and having a huge impact surround me it’s best for the next step. Asking self deeply to find what was lost inside me previously. When it gets bright, i write it down in my daily notebook. I started creating myself through what i wanted to know. Like organizations, society programs, environmental concerns, and healthy life phases. But in hindsight, the times I’ve felt the greatest sense of purpose were during those times of struggle. Bringing that hindsight to the present allows us to discover its beauty in the now.
Networking shouldn’t exist in anyone’s vocabulary.
While finding my purpose out of my comfort zone there’s always a challenge to do my best. Is it true that in mid-age (19–23) occasionally feel unworthy or undirected. By finding my purpose should be to have a mentor in real life. Maybe it can be your friends, parents, stranger, and of course god. But for me, all of that components must be balanced. As long as we need direction true people always seek great mentors in their journey. That’s called networking. Networking can be everyone who be with you as long as you can open yourself to be able to socialize it really helpful through mentoring ourselves. We can learn how to do life with them. And of course, if we matched we can adapt or learn from them. Networking is real affection and teacher for knowing the world through different perspectives and POVs. it really helps your next life.
The only enemy is yourself.
Growth is hard and sometimes is painful. It can be fun or it can be sad. It depends on how we reacted to our life. Marissa Anita said that in our purpose to be happy, life is under we can control in our thought. The deal is how we control our reactions not how to control their thought themselves. But how possible to control our reactions while the human heart is sensitive? It is true that we can’t deny our feelings when we have bad luck and expression for others. By controlling our reactions we can use them for contemplation. It’s not how we deny the negativity in our lives and ourselves, but how we acknowledge the negativity as balancing for positivity in our life.
On looking ahead
Thanks for making it all the way here, I hope you’ve gotten something out of reading the 8 insights above. At the very least, I hope I’ve shown you just how much my mind has expanded over the past year. Now I’ll leave you with one final thought:
YOLO: You only live once. No, really just live once.
There was something about turning 20 that made me really grapple with the transience of life. I realized that I had lived my whole life assuming, implicitly, that I would live forever, foolishly spending my time in ways that believe its scarcity. This realization hit home one day as I was scrolling on Instagram: I came across a series of videos where the creator visits beautiful places in the world, flaunting gorgeous pictures of each. I was first in awe of the majestic landmarks, but that awe quickly turned to sadness as it sunk in that I’d never see the majority of these in my lifetime. At that moment, lying on my couch with my phone in my hand, I feared my future regret.
Perhaps we are too short-sighted to see that we’ll pay for today’s complacency, complacency in going after the life we truly want, with tomorrow’s rue. Or perhaps we are too scared to admit that the life we truly want may require a lot of work and changes. Or perhaps we are too idealistic, hoping that life will fall perfectly into place such that we’ll have the exact right amount of time, energy, and resources to live our true lives later.
I find myself thinking a lot about what I want in this short journey we call life. What’s a life worth living as defined by me and me alone? Am I getting closer to that or not? 31 is not old, but it’s not young either. Am I making good use of the time I have left?
Let’s always keep in mind just how precious life is, and how easy it is to let it drift by aimlessly! Maybe only by embracing its fleeting nature will we appreciate it to the fullest.
I had my best experience when i can grow in an unexpected place with unexpected people and unexpected times. The journey i’ve ever had was really great journey. Thought me a lot of lessons such as finding myself, networking, my habits, my new life, traveling, environmental issues, and surrounding by great people. It is an amazing and unforgettable journey.
